Working Girls

“Well yes, we have a lovely lady working for you today. She’s blonde, she’s in her early twenties, and today she’s wearing for you a sexy policewoman’s uniform and black stockings, complete with standard-issue police hat and truncheon. I’m reliably informed that she’ll leave her hat on while she’s stripping, although I’ve got no idea what she’ll do with the truncheon.

Turn off at Junction 25, past the DIY store, second on your left, can’t miss it. Entrance is round the back.”

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“Well yes, we have a lovely lady working for you today. She’s blonde, she’s in her early twenties, and today she’s wearing for you a naughty nurse’s outfit. It’s got a zipper down the front which makes it easily removable, but I’m sure she’ll insist on giving you a lapdance and/or striptease first. It’s 40 for oral, 45 for sex and anything else is negotiable with the girl.

You want the address? Turn off at Junction 25, past the DIY store, second on your left, can’t miss it. Entrance is round the back.”

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” ‘Allo darlin’, do cum in. Sit yourself down, can I get you something to drink? I’m PC Lena Legih, and I’ve been working here for a couple of years now. Believe it or not I actually used to work as a serving police officer. But as we kept on arresting street workers, and my male colleagues fucked them in the car, I realized that they were having more fun than I was. So one night I swapped my regular working uniform for a fetish policewoman’s outfit, and stepped out on the beat. Sarge pulled me over, took down my particulars, and next day I was fired for gross professional misconduct. You’d think my offer of a blowjob each would’ve appeased them, but evidently not.

It’s 30 for French, 40 for full, and the rest can be negotiated in the room. And take your hands off my tits, you haven’t paid for ‘em yet!”

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“You know it’s funny you should ask that, because today we have working for us an actual nurse! You know how it is, they don’t pay them much on the NHS. Girl needs a supplementary income. So she came down here for an “audition”, the Boss liked what he saw, and she started work the next day. You’ve got to see her, she’s an absolute treat. Her name is Lucy, she’s blonde, she’s in her mid-to-late twenties, and of course she’s wearing for you her real nurse’s uniform with tan stockings and high heels. She’s sprawled across the couch right now, showing off her shapely legs.

Turn off at Junction 25, past the DIY store, second on your left, can’t miss it. Entrance is round the back.”

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“I can luv…today’s working girl is the lovely Sindy. She’s blonde, she’s in her early twenties, and today she simply can’t decide what to wear. On the one hand she wants to be all servile and submissive in her French maid’s uniform, catering to your every whim. But on the other hand she’s putting on her red PVC knee high boots, suggesting a more domineering side. What’s a girl to do when she can’t decide what to wear? Take her clothes off I suppose!

You want the address? Turn off at Junction 25, past the DIY store, second on the left, can’t miss it. Entrance is round the back.”

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“Y’know, you don’t get paid much for being an office girl these days. Girl needs a secondary job, to supplement her secretary’s income. So this afternoon, I shall be away “on business”, with a gentleman who knows how to splash the cash. Times are tough, belts are tight, girl needs to be selective in the company she keeps. No need for a change of outfit, I’m sure my clie…er, I mean my “business associate”, will like me just the way I am, in my office uniform with skirt and tan stockings.

I can trust you to explain my absence to the Boss, can’t I Kelvin? Or perhaps you need a little incentive?”

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“Well yes Commander, I’m sure we can arrange for a girl to fly out to entertain the troops. And I know just the girl for the job…the lovely Melanie. She’s brunette, she’s in her early 20’s, and she enjoys dressing up in all manner of sexy uniforms. She’s an athlete…she lost her Lottery funding, and turned to escort work to make ends meet. But she goes the distance, so to speak, and has the discipline and endurance to withstand the rigors of military fetish. She’s got no actual army experience, but she’s seen Vietnam films so I’m sure she’ll know what to do!

She doesn’t have to wear a veil, does she? Good, I don’t think she’s the type of girl who’s into covering up. And we can just parachute her in? OK, I’ll get that booked for you…”

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“I can luv…today’s working girl is the lovely Anneka. She’s blonde, she’s still in her teens, and today she’s wearing for you a naughty nurse’s uniform with fishnet pantyhose. She’s new here, but already she’s built up quite a reputation and is very popular with the punters. And since she’s still a student, it’s only natural that she does A-levels

You what luv? You’ll have to speak up, I can’t hear you. Oh you want the address? Turn off at Junction 25, past the DIY store, second on the right, can’t miss it. Entrance is round the back.”

“Fucking timewasters…”

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“Well yes, we have a lovely lady working for you today. She’s blonde, she’s in her early twenties, and today she’s wearing for you a naughty nurse’s uniform with soft pink lingerie and black stockings. She looks just like a real nurse when she’s here in the lounge, but in the room with the “patient” she gets much more intimate. A little bird tells me she offers the full girlfriend experience, although that of course would have to be negotiated with the girl.

Turn off at Junction 25, past the DIY store, second on your left, can’t miss it. Entrance is round the back.”

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“Ah yes, good evening Mr Pleat, we meet again. I’m Sergeant Ackland, you might remember me from back in the day. I was the junior officer who swapped my sexy police uniform for a short skirt and stockings, working undercover as a street girl to catch you in the act. On the beat, so to speak. Yes yes, I charge more these days.

I’m sure you know the drill by now. You do not have to say anything, but it may harm your defence if you do not mention when questioned something which you may later rely on in court. Anything you do say will be taken down and used in evidence. So if it really is true that you were “scouting for talent” by driving around looking at leggy street girls in miniskirts and high heels, then you will get the chance to put that before the court.

You are paying attention, aren’t you Mr Pleat?

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(NB. “Mr Pleat” has not been caught “scouting for talent” since 1987)